By Alicia Cruz Editor-in-Chief
Theblackurbantimes
Robin Givens appeared on Oprah Winfrey's show Friday and took her to task for not standing up for her (Givens) and other victims of domestic violence after brawny ex-husband Mike Tyson made a crude remark while on Oprah's show last month.
Apparently, the boxing champ and convicted rapist made light of having "socked" or "wanting to have socked" Givens during their stormy, brief marriage which was met with laughter by the audience.
Oprah didn't defend Givens or victims of domestic violence after Tyson's asinine remark and Givens, now a spokesperson for the National Domestic Violence Hot line, gracefully yet firmly, let the talk show mogul know how hurt she was.
Givens, who Tyson described as “tough” and “mean” was visibly hurt and spoke with a quivering voice at times during her Oprah appearance. She held back tears as she said, “I wouldn’t be honest if there wasn’t a part of me that wanted you to go, when he said, ‘Oh, I’ve socked her before…’ ‘That’s not right.’ And it wasn’t right, it was painful. He can say whatever about me… but there are so many women like me, in my situation, that I just feel when there is this laughter, if you are in that situation out there, it kind of lightens it.”
No matter what your opinion or thoughts about Givens and Tyson's marriage is or was, none of us were behind the doors of that mansion with them. We don't know what she endured. We do, however, know that Tyson has a history of violence against women, including Givens. We know that he has admitted to brutalizing Givens and no one deserves to be mistreated that way.
He and other persons have no business beating anyone or mistreating anyone emotionally, mentally or in any way that harms their emotional or mental well-being.
There's a door...use it. And ladies, if a man or anyone attempts to remove themselves from a volatile or potentially volatile situation...LET THEM LEAVE. LET THEM WALK AWAY. Please!!
Tomorrow is another day and when cooler heads prevail, everyone thinks clearer and behaves accordingly.
I think I speak for domestic violence victims all over the world when I say that we all applauded Givens for having the fortitude to stand up for herself and with such elegance and tenacity (as she is so well known and admired for). Givens, by all accounts, has always been a talented, classy, intelligent and beautiful woman and her appearance on Oprah was magnificent. She made great strides for domestic violence victims that day. Kudos, Robin!
She was honest and above all, absolutely within her right as a victim of one of the most heinous crimes committed against women, to speak out and ask that people be more proactive and supportive of the crime by not laughing at, with or about acts of violence committed against women, children and men.
Oprah is a very influential and powerful woman and I believe that if she had spoken out at Tyson for his making light of the abuse he inflicted upon Givens, she may have helped the DV cause in astronomical measures.
No one would have thought once about snickering or cackling at Tyson if he had made a crude remark about his abusive and violent attack upon Desiree Washington, the young beauty he was convicted of raping. I feel safe saying every woman in that audience would have pounced on his stocky frame and hung him by his jingle bells if he had made a crude remark about his rape victim ---with Oprah (who endured unspeakable acts of abuse and violence throughout her own life) leading the pack.
No, rape is not domestic violence when you line the two acts side-by-side, but they should be. Acts of domestic violence kill a woman's spirit and muddle her soul. Long after the physical scars fade or minimize, they are left with the emotional wounds that sometimes never heal, leaving that woman a shell of who and what she once was.
Women have lost their children behind domestic violence. Yes, there are several states that will remove children from their mother's custody if the mother has been the victim of domestic violence and they have and will charge her with "Failure To Protect." A law CPS has morphed into a weapon to persecute and inflict further abuse upon victims of domestic violence.
Some women have lost their families, sanity, dignity, will and sometimes, their lives.
It is never OK to make light of, minimize, ignore or aid and abet an act of or an individual who partakes in any acts of domestic violence or the abuse (physical, emotional, verbal or mental) of another human being...man, woman or child.
And if you meet a man or a woman who minimizes or glorifies acts of abuse or domestic violence...you better heed that as your biggest red flag and blaring warning sign and run, don't walk away...or you just might find yourself their next victim.
If you are a victim of domestic violence please call for help: 1.800.799.SAFE (7233) 1.800.787.3224 (TTY) Anonymous & Confidential Help 24/7
Get help if you are being abused
Grupos de Apoyo para Latinas Maltratadas
Stop Domestic Violence Against Men
On-Line Resources for Battered Men
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