Baller Blogging With Jalen Rose

CASH RULES EVERYTHING AROUND ME

But it doesn't rule the 6'7 Jalen Rose aka the ultra gentleman. In an interview, retired NBA player, University of Michigan (Fab Five) alumnus, and ESPN commentator Jalen Rose spoke about the trappings of being rich and famous and how he feels about it.

Read on:
“I’d rather have the problem of making a lot of money than have the problem of not making money," said Rose. "It’s weird having everyone know what you make. Growing up in the hood, if you have $100 in your pocket you never want anybody to know. You’re trying to turn it into all ones or two 50s to make it look good. But I was never that type. Making a lot of money sometimes does makes you feel that you’re part of a meat market. People don’t judge you by your character or what you represent."

"Being a God-fearing man, that [aspect] doesn’t agree with me. I try to take away from those scenarios or judgments on my own. But I’d rather have the problem of making money than not making money.

When you’re making the kind of money that athletes make, whether you come into that situation as a girlfriend, a date, or a homeboy, we’re not hanging out in the average car, we’re not hanging out in the average house and we’re not eating in the average restaurant. That’s not normal and I take it like it’s not normal. Your character is what carries you. I don’t meet people on the merits of what I do for them."

"I don’t buy my friends or relationships or situations, so I don’t have to live up to that. I’ve been lucky that I’m not one of these guys who are paying multiple rents around the country or having multiple babies or having women drive around in multiple cars. Guys don’t understand that if you give off that kind of energy, you should expect people to try and take advantage," said Rose.

"As Black people, we haven’t really been exposed to money. In the ’60s, we were still drinking from fountains [for colored people]. We don’t know how to spend it or save it. Some people are like “It comes fast, that’s how I’m spending it.” That’s not living life smartly. It’s not what you cop, it’s what you keep."

It hurts to see my brothers who have been successful lose everything that they worked so hard for -- but it can happen. All the thousands of dollars you spent on people or on things that don’t appreciate. All the people praying for your downfall and those you didn’t help as much as they felt you should have helped them will stand in the background and say, “that’s what you get."

Commentary

Alicia Cruz, Senior writer Theblackurbantimes

Money can buy friendships, sex, love and even happiness. It all depends on what you're looking for or expecting get: the quality and quantity. If you want a man or woman to truly love, respect and date you for you, then don't use your income, career, material possessions or superficial possessions as bait to lure them into your life, house or bedroom.

How something begins, is usually how it will end. If your bank account, vehicle, looks or job are magnets, expect those items to dictate how well and how long your relationships will last.
If you give off "use me, abuse me" vibes then expect to be used and don't blame the user, blame yourself.

We are in control of what happens to us and for how long. People will always try you; they'll try to use you, take what you have, strong you along, lie to you, manipulate you.

Once you become aware of what their true intentions are, it is your personal responsibility to end things. If you choose not to (for whatever reason), you cannot blame them for hurting you.
If you volunteer to be a victim, you have no one to blame be yourself. Being a patsy and pushover for someone you think you love or like won't get you anywhere but used and dumped once you're no longer pliable or gullible.

This is not an attractive trait and no, playing the 'roll over and play dead' role won't make the object of your affection feel sorry for you and fall in love with you. You might get some pity sex and a few more pity dates, but it won't change the course of your relationship.

And if you've sunk to stalking them or hanging around obsessively despite the obvious fact that you aren't wanted or respected, you might earn a stalking charge, restraining order and/or a beat down by their new love or family member.

We only allow people to use and abuse us because we don't love ourselves. For some reason we're struggling with self-esteem issues. All you can do is look inside of yourself, get some help and learn to love yourself first.

I don't care where you work, how much you make, what you drive or wear or how much you spend on someone else, if you do not love yourself you cannot love anyone else and no one will truly love you. Money can buy a lot of temporary things, but it will never buy you an eternity of, as Cuba Gooding Jr said, "The Kwan."

If you're hiding things; going into relationships with lies and secrets and head games, it will end -- eventually and it will likely end badly. Life and relationships always come full circle, mi gentes. Always.

And bear in mind that sometimes, when people are overly generous (to a fault) and give off a "I'm such a nice guy/woman" and "I'll do anything for people" vibes, sometimes...sometimes all of that generosity, niceness and spending is to buy being dishonest and illusive about other things.

If you're putting out a lot of bull, games, lies and other trash, you're going to get it back and probably when you least expect it. So find the fortitude to love yourself or at least like yourself enough to treat yourself and others with dignity and respect and get the creme life has to offer rather than the,uh, manure.

Good love to each and all.