I'm the poet in disguise,
Running from pain, ignoring the lies,
Using my words as a way to lay in the skies,
And sentencing myself life without tears so I have dry cries,
Almost four years since water has ran down my face,
Well at least from my eyes because sweat takes the place,
Sleepless nights, enraged days, too much time I done waste,
With memories locking me in time, but I still tend to trace,
Every moment with her, from the good to the bad,
To the role of being her grandson to taking the roles of my dad,
Every moment we've had,
I've cherished it... and wished we shared our last,
No longer myself, I use an escape goat just for stealth,
Basketball was my ticket until problems with health,
Then it was again until I took the journey to wealth,
Spent all my money and was left with myself,
Ashamed so I ran away from myself again,
So many good memories I just tried to pretend,
But reality is too real so that's where dreaming begins,
And more time out of my home and more time with friends,
Comfortable with the new setting, everyone seems inviting,
They have easy issues so advice I began providing,
At the end of the night sleep gets them but my eyes and lids are not colliding,
Now I'm back to myself, and to my heart beat, I'm writing,
The words on the page flow without definition,
Their arrangement is chilled but high with ambition,
So read them out loud and only myself is there to listen,
So I leave my dreams in the past and move myself to the kitchen,
Finished what I wrote, read aloud my order of quotes,
Logged onto Facebook to write a new note,
A few friends are online and see my new post,
And leave comments without the laughs and the jokes,
I have a new way to run but sit still,
Less time and effort is put in, with no hospital bill,
No more ER rooms for me, at least going with my will,
So now friends are telling me beats I should kill,
Instrumentals make the aria to my words,
My life take the place of nouns and verbs,
Pronouns and adjectives are even sometimes heard,
But never do I say suicidal thoughts because that's absurd,
No worries never had any of those, just confusions on the roles,
To play, in the fronting of life and how it goes,
On without you knowing how I feel you just react to my clothes,
Or whats on my outside but who i am, no one ask, or even knows.
Running from pain, ignoring the lies,
Using my words as a way to lay in the skies,
And sentencing myself life without tears so I have dry cries,
Almost four years since water has ran down my face,
Well at least from my eyes because sweat takes the place,
Sleepless nights, enraged days, too much time I done waste,
With memories locking me in time, but I still tend to trace,
Every moment with her, from the good to the bad,
To the role of being her grandson to taking the roles of my dad,
Every moment we've had,
I've cherished it... and wished we shared our last,
No longer myself, I use an escape goat just for stealth,
Basketball was my ticket until problems with health,
Then it was again until I took the journey to wealth,
Spent all my money and was left with myself,
Ashamed so I ran away from myself again,
So many good memories I just tried to pretend,
But reality is too real so that's where dreaming begins,
And more time out of my home and more time with friends,
Comfortable with the new setting, everyone seems inviting,
They have easy issues so advice I began providing,
At the end of the night sleep gets them but my eyes and lids are not colliding,
Now I'm back to myself, and to my heart beat, I'm writing,
The words on the page flow without definition,
Their arrangement is chilled but high with ambition,
So read them out loud and only myself is there to listen,
So I leave my dreams in the past and move myself to the kitchen,
Finished what I wrote, read aloud my order of quotes,
Logged onto Facebook to write a new note,
A few friends are online and see my new post,
And leave comments without the laughs and the jokes,
I have a new way to run but sit still,
Less time and effort is put in, with no hospital bill,
No more ER rooms for me, at least going with my will,
So now friends are telling me beats I should kill,
Instrumentals make the aria to my words,
My life take the place of nouns and verbs,
Pronouns and adjectives are even sometimes heard,
But never do I say suicidal thoughts because that's absurd,
No worries never had any of those, just confusions on the roles,
To play, in the fronting of life and how it goes,
On without you knowing how I feel you just react to my clothes,
Or whats on my outside but who i am, no one ask, or even knows.
By Autrezz Williams
Bio: My name is Autrezz. I'm a young writer just writing to release thoughts that cloud up in my head. follow me on Twitter @PoeticArsonist or add me on Facebook http://www.facebook.com/freedomiskey or subscribe to my blog http://freedomiskey.blogspot.com/ or subscribe to my new Youtube channel PoeticArsonist.
Are you a poet or spoken word artist? Submit to Poet's Corner! Submit 1 - 3 poems, plus a short bio, with links, to ajhayes@theblackurbantimes.com
Media Outlets must credit The Black Urban Times www.theblackurbantimes.com twitter.com/thebutmsdotcom facebook.com/theblackurbantimes
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