How to react when a girl ask u to have sex

I was asked today:

Orrin, what do I do when a girl wants to have sex with me?

Ummmm....I dont understand the question. What do you do? Is this a trick question? Was this question written by a woman? Does the woman have two heads? Fur? 3 eyes?  3 legs? No legs? Tranny? Im lost.

If this indeed a true question i can only assume that this woman is either out of your leaugue, or hideous and either way im still not understanding the issue. To answer your question in short....BRO, BANG HER!!!!! But,if I must explain then I will. Because these are the only reasons I can conjure up for you to ask lets break them down.

IF SHE IS OUT OF YOUR LEAUGE AND WANTS TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU:

A woman that isnt in your attractiveness tax bracket wants to jump your bones? This really only happens for two reasons:
1. She has a hidden agengda.  If there is an ulterior motive such as she needs help with her midterm and your the smartest guy she doesnt socialize with, can be a valid reason for her to throw the goodies at you. There can be countless reasons for her to justify sleeping with you but at the end of the day, who gives a damn if she wants to give it up to you...BRO BANG HER

IF SHE IS HIDEOUS: 

There comes a time in every mans life where some not so looking girl, chubster, loud mouth, rude, and or obnoxious woman puts her eye on him, and at that point and time he has a decision to make. Wether to turn and run screaming for the hills, or to do what ive been saying for 2 paragraphs....BANG HER BRO!!!!  Every man in his life has knocked down a chubster, or Mrs uggg.

In the end if a woman wants to have sex with you...DONT EMAIL ME AND ASK WHAT YOU SHOULD DO...BANG HER!!!!

Top 5 things your girl wants you to do in bed

5. Give her an orgasm before actual intercourse

Ok, just breathe bro its not like she asking you to learn Russian in a day, which actually might be easier right? From my experience the forplay can be pretty intense if done right. A nibble here a bite there and full oral sometimes fellas can have her shaking like she stuck her finger in an electrical socket.

4. lasting longer in bed.

You shouldnt have to have this convo with another man but its a real conversation we need to have buddy.  Hundred of thousands of guys suffer from this so i hear, but all i can give you is what works for me. While having sex all of us men get over excited, especially if its a woman you have Ben chasing Down for about a year and she's FINALLY giving it up to you. It can be a bit overwhelming and sometime the show is over be for the main event even starts. My tip: take your time. Dont get in it and lose your damn mind stay calm relax and stroke like you've gotten some before. I mean you have gotten some before right?

3. TEASING HER UNTIL SHE BEGS FOR IT

if you are an Avid reader of www.risquecurves.com then you know i am all about men being alpha males.  Sadly what i've noticed is that even the most dominant of males quiver, and cower once a woman is in their bedroom. Fellas when you dominate you dominate completely from the "roota to the toota" as my grandfather would say. Take control. Toss her around a little talk dirty a little women love pure beast mode when its appropriate.

2. More oral sex

Ok, so its 2012 right and i still here guys in bars and at gatherings say, "hell no i dont go Down on my woman"  dude....foreal?  This to me is a fatal flaw. I myself love receiving, so inorder to get brothers you got to give. Because if you dont you can expect a bj like you expect a birthday gift once a year.

1. Learn how to give her an orgasm

surprised? Hope not. This is my number one as im sure it is All womens number one thing they want you to do in bed. As a man my ego use to get in the way I literally lived by the code "you better get yours before i get mine." And with the Friday night street rat I really didnt care, but it wasnt until i met and dated an older woman that i wanted to know the intricate details of a womans body and what made her shiver. Upon this research I learned that when a woman is satisfied "NO" isnt even in their vocabulary. I even had this woman do this thing with grape jelly and....oh sorry almost had a flash back.... The point is learn your womans body.take time make it fun i garuntee you wont be disappointed. Have I told you wrong thus Far....exactly. Oh and for all you lazy selfish ass holes who want the for dummies guide to giving her an orgasm check out..

Orrin Carter

http://www.sexgodmethod.com/sgm/tsbmag.html

Single people: curse of the clueless and blind by @odiggler

Last night i was on the phone with a friend at some ungodly hour of the night. We talked about all the usual things and the most ridiculous thing flew out her mouth. Now, let me hedge my thoughts by saying my friend is extremely smart and for all intensive purposes very right about alot of things.  But on this day I felt that she may have been talking out her ass. What did she say? What did she speak that I thought was utterly and completely not based on any logic other than she falls into the category: "being married  and being together are basically the same thing"

  The only reason i even entertained this convo, was purely for research purposes... Ok and a little entertainment.  It is this writers opinion that i dont care how long your in a relationship, there is no substitute for the religous and legal vowes you take.  The only people who I know that dont share the same opinion i do is people who arent married.  Reguardless of the divorce rate or the single man/ woman mentality marriage is more than just taking up space.  Marriage is more than sharing a bank account and more than to people who dont want to be with anyone else. Marriage is way of life, its a feeling a legal and binding contract that means "from now and mutha freaking on" single and or bitter people maKe up some weird and oulandish idealogy about "its only a piece of paper." What these weird people fail to realize is that there is no substitute for the real thing. Using soda stream doesnt replace coke.

Marriage is hard
Marriage is long
Marriage is "from now and mutha freaking on"

But most importantly marriage is NOT something that should be used in conjunction with "we might as well be"

But i forgive these people mostly because the only way to know about marriage is to have been or be married.

Its ok single people we still love you:)

Woman entitlement: the step by step process of emasculating a man by @odiggler

<p>&lt;p&gt;&amp;lt;p&amp;gt;&amp;amp;lt;p&amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;lt;p&amp;amp;amp;gt;As I sit in this laundry Matt waiting on my clothes to dry and my ride to pick me up, I cant help but over hear this couple argue.&amp;amp;amp;amp;nbsp; Apparently the couple had a dinner date set up and this woman who is clearly&amp;amp;amp;amp;nbsp; dating this older gentleman for the 57&amp;amp;amp;nbsp; Chevy classically restored and a piece of his retirement. Seems aggravated because the gentleman is fussing about her standing him up. He is scolding her saying how fucked up that was and all she could utter was "its not that serious."&amp;amp;amp;#160; I damn near fell out my seat laughing at the pair of gonads on this woman for being blatantly disrespectful. But it got me to thinking....&amp;amp;lt;/p&amp;amp;gt;&amp;lt;br&amp;gt;&lt;br&gt;<br>
&amp;amp;lt;p&amp;amp;gt;There is a double standard amongst men and women that hasnt been addressed and its almost surprising that in this day age men still let the "modern" woman confuse and emasculate us without a fight. It is this pretty much common knowledge... Or at least to me that a woman picks and chooses what is fair and compromising in relationships. we as men are groomed to accept the self rightousness and indignation of the woman population.&amp;amp;#160; Women are raised that the right man for them will love them unconditionally and go above and beyond to make and keep her happy.&amp;nbsp; But what seems to get lost in the shuffle is the reciprocation to the man of their dreams. The new modern woman is taught to damn near hate men and use the mans love for women for they basic and luxurious needs and wants.

I watch this everyday and sadly enough there is no end in site.

MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE

*Names changed

* If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other
Laura, Kate and Sarah.

* If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each
other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes.


EATING OUT

* When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even
though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and
none will actually admit they want change back.

* When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators and the catting begins after you all leave about who paid more or less.


MONEY

* A typical man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

* A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale... then complain when it breaks after one use or breaks her skin out.


BATHROOMS

* A typical man's bathroom is stocked with essentials: toilet paper, mouthwash, toothbrush and toothpaste, bandaids, alcohol, peroxide, a cleaning product, shavingcream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel .

* The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. We'll have two of this, three of that, six of this and several items we either haven't ever used and won't.


ARGUMENTS

* A woman has to have the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
* A typical man says maybe six words and within those six are the beginning, end and bottom line.


FUTURE

* Some women worry about the future until she gets a husband.

* Some typical men never worry about the future until they get a wife.


SUCCESS

* Some successful men are those who make more money than their wives can
spend.

* Some successful women are the ones who can find such a man.


MARRIAGE

* Some women marry a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't..

* Some men marry a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.



DRESSING UP

* Some women will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash,
answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail..

* Some men will dress up for weddings and funerals. [and sometimes then only
under duress]


NATURAL

* Some Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.

* Some women somehow deteriorate during the night.


OFFSPRING

* Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children.. She knows
about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods,
secret fears and hopes and dreams.

* Some men are vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

LOL

Send this to women who have a sense of humor and who can handle
it ... and to the men who will enjoy reading it.